Moving slowly as quickly as possible.
Employing magical physics.
Arguing in contradictions
Making feeble efforts never had required so much strength. I t didn't feel like i was running backwards as much as it felt like I was taking part in motionless action.
Remaining positive always came easy at the small cost of having my sanity questioned.
So two of the crew had been arrested for trying to steal a Men at Work sign during their lunch break. After getting the full story it boiled down to them being bored and wanting to try sneaking around in plain sight. So now our group's intentions were not as much in question as our over all intelligence quotient. All we could think of was now who will our designated drivers be? We did not have bail money set aside in the budget yet, but this seemed like an excellent time to think of such things. That feeling of digging a hole in wet sand was all too familiar. Accounting was never a great strength of ours nor was forethought. Freagin' details!!!
So trying to convince the court that this was just a harmless prank was not as easy as when we discussed it on the ride over there. The fact that I could not find a pair of shoes to wear to court did not help us either. The guards at the metal detector did not seem very impressed with the multiple church keys on our key chains or the buckles plastered with beer logos we had to run through their machine. I was not aware that body piercings would set off the alarm that easily or that the guards would have to see them right then and there. So after our fifteen minute delay at the door and one of the guards suggesting deportation we were in.
The judge was on a roll till he saw us and the defendants approach. I was aware at how swift the law was being interpreted but was more amazed at how quickly it was being enforced. I am still not sure if we were even asked to enter a plea after one of our crew dropped a bag of skittles on the courtroom floor while the other made horny middle school faces at the court reporter. The more amazing part of the day is that we were not held in contempt of court. The judge could barely hold back the disdain in his voice when he set the bail at half a million and the court date as far out as the clerk's agenda would go. A few things were evident. Women do not like having tongues waggled at them at their place of employ, you should find the end of the bag of skittles that has the little scoring, flip flops are never dressy, and most of all we needed funding.
So he was an ex-marine turned hippie turned green peace warrior turned crazy old guy with a machine shop and lots of free time. All I knew is that this grey guy was the perfect fit and properly anesthetized to believe in the mission. In the end it did not take much more convincing and the deal was made when we mentioned sticking it to the man.
We solidified his membership over a case of Keystone and half a pizza...
Much like a penny racer we were off with no real direction but interesting to watch...
I hope that all of you have been enjoying this story as much as I have enjoyed writing it.
As promised Alien Burro is having its first giveaway!!!
We will be printing the first batch of Alien Burro Free the Flamingos shirts in the next couple of weeks. In order to get your name in the hat just become a follower. We will be picking three from the membership to receive the first run shirts with an authentic Alien Burro signature on New Year's Eve. Rumor has it that they will be worth two shirts someday...
Big Love for all of you and thank you for your support in this new endeavor!!!
RELEASE THE PINK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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